Another Day Older

Dear Zi Jia,

Almost 2 months have passed since we learned of you.

But you still don't know us and likely won't soon.

A few days ago was your 10-month birthday and in a few more days I'll watch your 11-month birthday slip past.

And the months will continue to fall away as you exist half a world away from us.

It breaks my heart into a million pieces to think from when we knew of you until you'll likely know of us, you will double in age.

At an age when each day counts.

Every day is another day you live in an orphanage.

Every day is another day that you are undernourished.

Every day is another day that you are not stimulated enough, held enough.
Every day is another day I worry about you, ache to hold you and take care of your needs.